The Confessions of my Life
by Hazeleyes93
Summary: Kagome is casting out her old life. After her divorce, she and her daughter move to the States and live a quiet life. On a trip to New York Fashion Week, she meets a man who sets her soul on fire and has everything she wants. But can he fix he jaded heart
1. Chapter 1

"Please, just listen!" came her tearful plea.

"Save it."

As I look upon the women that I had thought of as my best friend, my sister even, I was filled with rage. How in the _hell _did she come off acting like the victim of this situation? The women who has been having an affair with my husband and is now pregnant by him. And has just come to tell me she loves him. I'm beginning to think the fates hate me.

"It wasn't suppose to be like this! Kagome, just listen! I...I don't know how it happened. He said you weren't the same anymore, that you were different...the looks you gave him! They were horrible!"

"Oh so that gives you the right to have sex with him! I can't believe you, that's the sorriest excuse I have ever heard!"

"But-"

"Get the fuck out of my house!"

She gave me one more pleading look and walked out the door. Of all the things that he could have done to me, he picks this. He even had the nerve to tell me after we had sex and that he'd be gone tomorrow morning. Its like they planned to do this in a way that would hurt me the most. Never in my life had I felt so betrayed. And never had I felt so stupid. Its times like these you realize all the mistakes you made. How stupid I was to think that at fifteen, a twenty-two year old man would love me. How stupid I was to think that when I had sex with him, it was consentual. How when I got pregnant, instead of listening to my mom, I decided that I was going to let Lucas dictate what I should do and marry him. I was so naive thinking he had mine and our childs best interests when all along he was just making sure no one knew about us. I don't know, maybe it was his soft Spanish accent that lulled me into complience, but the haze had cleared. All that was left was an angry woman who wanted revenge for everything he took.

"Mommy? Why were you and Aunt Rina fighting?"

My pride and joy, my baby, my everything, Lily. When I found out four years ago I was pregnant, I was rightfully scared. But when they put her in my arms, everything just felt like it would be alright. She made everything feel better. I can't expain it, she just felt _right, _that out of all my mistakes, she wasn't one. And I could never remember feeling more happiness and content. And as she opened her eyes, I made a promise that no matter what happened to me she would have a good life, that she would always be happy, that I would give her the world. I had to calm down, I hated being angry in front of her.

She stared up at me with her endless azure eyes, one of the only things she inherited from me. I just loved looking at her. She was like a little China doll. Coal black hair, pink colored lips, high cheek bones, slanted eyes. The only thing that took away from the image was her lightly tanned skin and her elfin ears. All inherited from her wolf youkai father. She was no longer calling that whore her aunt. She didn't deserve the title.

"Honey, Rina isn't you aunt"

"But you said she was. Then that meant you lied. I thought you said we're not suppose to lie. "

"We're not honey. Mommy's very sorry for lying.", I said patiently.

"Its okay", she giggled, "just dont do it again. Hey, i'm gonna be late for school! Hurry mommy!"

"Yes ma'am!" I drove her to Han's Academy, a preschool specialized in youkai and hanyou children. I have no clue as to what they do in there, but she comes home from the bus raving about how much she likes it and about all her friends. I'm just happy she's happy.

* * *

Once she's in the building, I drive off to my mom's. The Higurashi Shrine intstills peace and bliss into its vistors, but always seems to mock me. Started right around the time I met Lucas. I park on the side of the street, walking up the hundreds of stairs, letting my mind drift on my future plans.

"Kagome? Is that you girl?"

I look up to see my senile grandfather. A petrified toad in one hand, a sutra in the other. "About time you got here to pray. You should be visiting everyday for all the shame you put on this family"

"It's nice to see you too grandpa. Is mom here? I need to talk to her." His insults and condemings stopped bothering me a long time ago. Yeah, I know i'm stupid, I don't need you remindiing me. The house smells like curry as usual. I pass the living room and see my baby brother Souta playing his video games, his face in front of the tv, a concentrating look, as if the game was real and only he could save the world.

"Souta" I come behind him and and place my hand on his shoulder while kissing the crown of his head. He turned and started fidgeting. Oh...um hi sis. as he averts his eyes to the floor. Its been this way since I got pregnant. I guess I let him down. I went from being the perfect sister to a rebellios hellion. I stopped hanging out with him, and whenever I was around, I was cruel and cold-hearted. I can only hope he has forgiven me. "Hows Lily?"

"She's fine. And in school. Why aren't you?"

"I got suspended."

"For?"

"Fighting"

"And you were fighting why?"

"Because he threw my books on the floor."

"And that warrants you to get into a fight why?"

"Because I can't let him disrespect me like that! Then everybody else will think they can treat me that way!"

I sigh at his fourteen year old logic. I'll never understand. My mom's in the kitchen over a pot. I sit at the table and wait for her to turn her attention to me. I feel something jump onto my legs and look down to see Buyo. I idlely sratch his ears while I watch her work. Finally she turns to me with an expectant look on her face.

"I'm getting a divorce." She smiles and sits across from me.

"It's lovely to see you dear. How have you been? Hows my pretty grandaughter?" I look at her strangely.

"I'm moving to the States as well."

"How's work?"

"Maybe to Gerogia, but i'm not certain."

"Enough!" She has a frown on her face. "Now I haven't seen you in three months, and now that you do come all you have is bad news." My mother scares and confuses me sometimes. You would think that after she adamently dissappoved of my choices in the past, she would be happy i'm getting away from Lucus.

"Now what's all this? How did this come about?"

"He got Rina pregnant and decided he wants to marry her."

"And what's with this moving?"

"I don't want to be in the same country as them. I want to start anew. The States the best place."

"And all this was decided when?"

"Today"

"And how do you plan on making a living?"

"Pursuing my dream. Become a fashion photograper and have my own modeling agency."

"And when do you plan on moving?"

"As soon as Lily's summer vacation starts."

"I wish you the best of luck"

"Thank you. I appreciate it. I'll call you when everything's final."

* * *

A black Porche was in my driveway. It went right along with the sleek stone house it was parked in front of. I was tempted to run into the back of it just to spite him. However I swallowed the urge and composed myself to see him. Thank god Lily wasn't here.

He was sitting in the living room staring idly. I took a moment to study him. Shoulder lenght black hair, onyx eyes, elfin ears, high cheekbones, red lips, wearing an Armani gray suit around his muscular body. Yep, I sure do know why I did everything he told me. Boy, could I pick em.

"Is there something you needed?" I said in my coldest voice.

"Oh, I just need you to sign some papers, then i'll be on my way" he said in a loftty voice. He took them out of his front pockect and held out a pen. I snatched it out of his hands and furiously signed my name on the dotted lines.

"There, now leave."

"We also have some matters to discuss pretaining to Lily." He motioned for me to take a seat. I took off my pumps and tucked my feet under me, waiting for him to continue.

"I feel that with this divorce, I should limit my time with little Lily so that I can focus on my new family and make this seperation easier on her."

And with that statement, he made me the maddest women on earth. Divorce not only me but your child? Because you got another women pregnant? I was seeing red. I was close to going to jail for a first degree murder.

"So you want to abandon your child?" I said in a deathly whisper. The man started to smile. He actually started to smile.

"Not abandon dear Kagome. However I feel I should seperate myself from her, as I don't want my other children vying and competing for my attention."

"I'll tell you what. Since you want to abandon your child, i'm going to assume your not going to pay child-support. So write a check for ten thousand to take care of her needs and you'll never see her again." I said, my voice going into a hiss.

"I knew we'd find a compromise", he said happily as he wrote the check. "Now when she gets home just explain the situation to her and everyone can go on with there lives"

I laugh at this. "Oh, man enough to abandon her, but can't explain it to her?" He grinned. "Such awful words spilling from your mouth" and he walked out the door.

"Bastard."


	2. Chapter 2

Kagome: 29

Kagome: 29

Sesshomaru: 36

Lucas: 36

Lily: 14

Kikyo: 26

Tomiko means "treasured beauty child"

_ Chp.1 Stone in my Heart_

* * *

"What's seven plus Sunday?"

"Saturday. Why?"

"I have to make a dance up by then."

Lily wasn't my little girl anymore. She grew up, and filled out. Long black hair that went to her waist and was two toned, the second being pink. Her doe eyes lightened to a pale blue. She had high cheek bones and full lips. She was full breasted, small waist and wide hips. I worry for her, she had the body of a grown woman. I didn't want her to find herself in a situation like me. While I was gearing up to be the bitchy and overprotective mom, she surprised me. She showed no interest in the opposite sex, saying they we're immature and ignorant. Besides, she said, they wanted the preppy girls not the punk rock stars. Like I thought, she didn't take her father leaving very well. When we moved to Georgia ten years ago she cried nonstop and there was nothing I could do. After she stopped crying she became reclusive. I put her in dance classes to direct her attention from the stress at home. Turned out that she loved it. Soon my larger than life girl was back and better then ever. I bought a condo in the center of Atlanta and put Lily in a magnet school for dance and she loved it. The students came from all walks of life and species I never knew existed were there. I got a intern job as a fashion photographer at D&G Agencies.

I was still bitter about the whole situation and finding out that the three year old child Rina had was actually Lucas' didn't make it any better. To think, the cheerful child that Lily played with was her half-sister. Lucas decided to tell me that bit of information when I was boarding the plane to the states. He turned me off of men and I doubt I can ever be in another relationship again. I hate him so much. While working at D&G I met my best friend who replaced Rina in my heart completely. Her name was Shay and she would eventually become my advertising partner. To be honest, I couldn't stand her at first. She annoyed the hell out of me always asking me to go out with her to some club. I was a bitch to her in an attempt to get her to leave me alone but she didn't budge. I just started saying yes to get her to shut up and it turned out to be fun. She became like a sister to me and she is the only one who knows everything about my past.

"What type of dance is it?"

"Modern dance, nothing too hard. If it was Jazz then we'd have a problem, I absolutely suck at it."

"I'm going to assume your going to perform it for an audience?" I was looking through some hopefuls portfolios. I was getting ready to go to New York for Fashion Week. My magazine was doing a ten page spread on it, and my top model, Kikyo Sato was walking the runway. If I played my cards right, I could sign a few freelance models and get more advertising agencies and fashion designers.

"Yeah, next Tuesday. Will you be able to come?"

Of course perfect time too. I'm coming home Monday night." At the mention of me leaving her eyes lit up. _Oh lord_. She's gonna start nagging again. For a month she been trying to convince me to let her go to fashion week with me.

"About that...''

"No"

"But-"

"_No_", I said with a bit more force. I felt a headache coming on.

"Please? You won't even see me till its time to come back. I'll be on my best behavior."

I rubbed the bridge of my nose. "Regardless of what you say, I'm not changing my mind."

"Give me a good reason why I can't go." She crossed her arms and flopped on the sofa pouting_. God, she's such an annoying bitch sometimes._

"I'll give you three. One, you have to make up a dance that's due on Sunday. Or do you want to look a mess when you perform? You know good and well if you go with me you won't be able to focus. Second, I'm only there for four days, and you want to see it from beginning to end. And finally, because I said so, that's why." She looked like she was going to start whining again so I came up with a quick solution. "If you shut up now and don't say anything else about New York I'll take you to Milan and let you walk when I have my own show."

"Milan?", she said in a shocked voice. Her eyes widened at this.

"Yes Milan."

"As in Milan Italy in Europe?"

"The very same. You want it?" She nodded dumbly.

"Then no more talk of New York. We clear?"

"Yes" she got up and walked up the stairs in a trance.

I laid down on the sofa and soon heard a scream followed by a _'Oh my God Rin, I'm walking in Milan!'_ I was done with reviewing and had to call my secretary Mia to give out some orders.

"Smoke Management, Ms.Higurashi's office, how may I help you?" she said in an overly cheery voice.

Ah, my Modeling Agency. I worked so damn hard for it. By 2001 I had enough of a client base to start my photography firm, L.A.H Photography after Lily's initials. With a bit of the check from Lucas I bought an old warehouse. I hired some contractors and a interior designer. Got a lawyer to take care of the legal stuff and got my business licence. Early 2005 I opened my modeling agency and it was a big success. I was a hit for the newbies for the individual care they received. I had over 2,000 girls signed to me and was rising to the top.

"Its me Mia" as I began filing my nails.

"Oh, hey boss. How's it going?", as she stifled a yawn.

"Fine, I need you to give out some new assignments for me"

"Yeah, whatcha need?"

"Alright, tell Phoenix I need all models to give me two new headshots. Brad better have all paychecks ready and handed out by Thursday 3:00. Reschedule all my interviews for today to Monday morning. Tell Shay I want a newspaper article about us and I want to find new ways to make Kikyo more famous then what she already is. Set that meeting up at 5 on Thursday. Board meeting on Friday to discuss the show were doing in Milan. Have the printers come to that too. I heard Vogue is looking for some girls for a shoot, call them and see if there interested if they are, tell Aimee to pick however many girls they need and I'll review it later. Is everything done for the open call next month?"

"Yep you just have to be there."

"Wonderful. How many cancellations did we have today?"

"Only four, majority was Clive. I told you not to give him the time of day."

"Yeah I know, but he's good when he pulls through he does wonders. He jump started Kikyo's career remember?"

"Whatever, that's everything you need?"

"Have my coffee ready when I come to do the shoot later?"

"Of course"

"Great later."

I was having a good day. We only had four cancellations, and that was our lowest yet. I loved my job, but it's was so stressful. The upside to it was I was filthy rich. The down side was that there was no such thing as a closed day. We were working our asses off 24 hours a day. I couldn't take seeing my office everyday so I switched between there and home. We took care of everything for our girls. We trained models, got test shoots, layout portfolios, and put together comp cards and all the other printed materials they needed. We find work for them by presenting them to designers, photographers and ad agencies, booking the jobs, and took care of the billing for the jobs. While we were pulling our hair out taking care of every little detail they sat around waiting to do a job. It was frustrating to no end and almost everyone in this business had an attitude but we did what we had to do. I was in a good mood and wanted to do my favorite thing in the world, shopping. I went upstairs to get Lily cause I now she would want to come.

She had changed into a pair of hipster underwear and a tank top. She was jumping on her bed, the band Paramore blasting. She was using her hairdryer as a mic. I just so happened to be standing in front of her when she jumped off the bed. She used me as a crashpad and we tumbled to the floor.

"Oh hey what are you doing here?" she folded her arms on my chest and rested her head on them.

"Nothing, just wondering if you want to come shopping with me" I said airily, bringing my hands to the side of her waist.

"Yeah? Where to?"

"Mall of Georgia" I said shrugging

"Aswesomeness. Be ready in five?" she pecked me on the lips and stood up, bringing me up with her.

I walked down the hall to my room and in to my closet. I was going for simple and comfy. I pulled out a pair of denim shorts with a Rolling Stones Shirt and some black high top Converse. I put my hair in a high ponytail and put on some sunglasses. I grabbed my purse and was ready to go. At the bottom of the stairs was Lily in all her glory. She had on a white polo shirt with a black tie. Black plaid mini skirt with suspenders, and some black boots that came to mid-calf. She had her hair messy with a pink bow for color I guess.

"Well don't you look like a teenager" she teased.

I rolled my eyes." I'm 29 I can get away with it. Now shut up and get in the car_." Yeah, yeah, yeah _came her reply.

* * *

We hit Belk, Dillard's, JCPenney, Macy's, and Nordstrom, Limited, and Bed Bath and Beyond. We were having a good time and were going to catch a movie. Of course, she picks this time to start a argument.

"Lily Tomiko Higurashi you are not getting a mohawk!"

"But all my friends are getting one" she whined.

"I don't care what your friends have. You are not your friends. And if I were your friends parents I'd slap the shit out of them." I said in an irritated voice.

"But there cute!"

"No they aren't their ugly as fuck and unattractive. Why in the world would you want to shave the sides of your head with a strip of hair left sticking up? Besides, you wouldn't look right with it anyway. Of all the crap you can ask for, you pick that shit. What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Ah momma, why do you have to be such a-" she stopped mid-sentence and was looking wide eyed in front of her. I turned to see what she was looking at and I was instantly enraged. Before me stood Lucas, his bitch and there three kids. He was at the ticket booth and was smirking at me. Rina was looking at me as though she didn't know who I was. The children were looking on clueless. _How dare he?_ I thought. _How dare he come here?_ He knew I was here so why come? The arrangement was he and his bitch would go to live in Barcelona and I was to move to Georgia so that I wouldn't see him in Japan. Occasionally he would come to the States, but mostly Los Angeles, Chicago and New York, which was the reason I never cared to live there. Georgia was to be my sanctuary from my past. He had no right to be here. His youngest daughter turned and reached up, placing her hand on his arm.

"Daddy, do you know who they are?"

Lily sucked in a breath suddenly. I looked over and she had her head bowed and was slightly shaking.

"No Marie, I have no idea who they are, they're complete strangers."

Mya however seem to recognize me. "Oh my God, you're Kagome Higurashi! I've wanted to meet you for such a long time! My name is Mya Morales. These are my parents Lucas and Rina, and my younger sister and brother Marie and Costos. I'm coming to your open call next month, and I sent in my head shots. Have you seen them yet?"

"I get many portfolios a day. While I have been looking over the more recent ones, I don't believe I've come across yours." I said in an even voice. She didn't do anything to me. Her parents were the ones I despised. I knew for a fact that I hadn't gotten to her pictures yet. If I did, I would have been royally pissed. Mya had grown into a beautiful girl. She and Lily almost looked alike except she had dark brown hair that when to her waist, Onyx eyes, and had fluffy black ears.

"Mom I really don't feel like seeing a movie anymore. I want to go home." With that said she turned around and headed to the car. I gave them one more hateful glare. Lucas was smiling fully now. Rina wouldn't look at me. I turned and chased after my daughter. I knew she would be in tears and mommy mode kicked in.

She was leaning against the car her bangs hiding her eyes.

"Lily" I said gently.

She looked up, and sure enough tears were marring her beautiful face. "He...he didn't tell them? Why wouldn't he tell them they have a half-sister?", she said in a defeated voice. I gathered her in my arms and her arms wound around me tightly her head cradled in the crook of my neck. "Because Lucas is a bastard Lily. He is a fool. He tries to defeat us, but we will not let him." I said softly as I ran my fingers through her hair.

"Why doesn't he love me?" she said in a broken voice.

I couldn't help but start crying. What was a mother to say to that? There will be times when Lily and I have a conversation that wound me, but this, this ache in my heart; I don't think I will ever feel anything close to it. My baby was hurting and there was nothing that I could do about it. How badly I wanted to take away her pain her suffering. The heartache, the rejection, the feeling of not being worthy. I would gladly bear it for her. I couldn't protect her. This was the second time he had hurt her, and I did nothing to stop it. No more I thought. He won't hurt her anymore, over my dead body will he I thought fiercely. I would shield her from this, even if it cost me my life. He will not ruin her life any further.

"Look at me" I said as I dragged her face up. "You are the single most important and precious thing to me. As soon as they put you in my arms, I fell in love you. I would die without you in my life. Your father doesn't deserve your love, and he never will. Dry your eyes, because he isn't worth your tears. I love you and that is enough. We are a family, and we is all we will ever need"

_I hate you Lucas Morales. I hope you die._

* * *

I left Wednesday night feeling like a failure of a mother. Lily had stopped crying, but I feared she would become reclusive again. Nevertheless, I shipped her off to Rin's house tell her how much I loved her many times. Me and my party boarded the plane and were in New York before I knew it and were pulling up to the Ritz Hotel. I had a fitful night of sleep, and got up in a foul mood. We went to the show and it was packed and I had little breathing room but I had to deal with it. 60 girls would be walking, 12 would be mine. Soon, the lights dimmed and the show started. I won't go into any details, but I will say that each girl walked four times, Kikyo walked out and a flurry of excitement ran through the crowd as she walked and I swelled with pride. I was extremely happy that I remembered to were my sunglasses, or I would have been blind. The show lasted and hour. When the show ended, I headed to the exit, contemplating whether or not I should call Lily. I wasn't paying as much attention as I should have, and I walked right into something hard. I started to fall but luckily the person had quick reflexes and caught me. I looked up to my savior and had to gasp. He was gorgeous! Pale silver hair that went to his waist, golden eyes, thin lips. He was muscular, but it wasn't overdone. He was an inu if I was right. I felt heat pool into my stomach. I hadn't been touched by a man in three years. I hadn't been attracted to one since my divorce. He would have been perfect if he didn't have that sneer on his face.

"Oh! Forgive me, I wasn't paying attention."

"It it's of no consequence. This Sesshomaru was also not paying attention", he said in a deep baritone voice. It sent a chill up my spine. He let me go and stepped back, and I felt a loss of warmth.

"Yes, but really, I should be watching were I was going. Thank you for catching me. I continued to walk through the crowd until I came to Shay.

"Kagome baby, you look horrible! Didn't you get any sleep last night?"

"No, I was too worried about Lily to sleep."

"What's wrong with her? She sick?"

"No. She saw him on Sunday."

"Oh."

"God Shay it was horrible. He was with his family, and one of his girls asked if he knew us, and he said he didn't. Broke Lily's heart, she asked me why he didn't love her. I wanted to kill him so badly. I finally got her to stop crying. Now she just won't talk. I'm just worried she's going to become reclusive again."

"Well, only time will tell dear. For now, just worry about doing the job."

"Yeah I know, but I hate leaving her like that. I know she's going to be sleeping in my bed now."

"Are you going to let her?"

"Of course I am! She can sleep with me as long as she needs to. I'm going back to the hotel, I'm dead tired. What do you think my chances are of getting in touch with Kikyo?"

"Slim to none. Wait till the party on Sunday"

"Fine. Her new head shots came in. I know she wants to see them. Plus I brought her paycheck with me. I'll see you later Shay."

The next three passed in a similar fashion. Except I didn't see that sexy inu anywhere. I hadn't felt anything this intense with a guy in a while, but I labeled it as deep lust. I didn't want a relationship, Lucas was more then enough. I don't even think I can function in a normal relationship anymore. Besides, men hurt Lily, and I wasn't letting anyone hurting Lily anymore.

Sunday came and I got ready for the party. I put in a silver Chiffon dress with a cinched waist and silver stilettos that laced up my legs. I put my hair in a side bun with side swept bangs, and a jade comb to hold it all up. I only put on silver eye shadow and some lip gloss, grabbed my matching clutch, and was out the door.

The place was packed, and I flagged down a waiter for some champagne. I saw Shay and Kikyo standing next to each other and made my way over to them. Shay was wearing a brown halter top dress that ran to the floor and exposed all of her back. Her hair was curled into ringlets and her only jewelry was a diamond studded bracelet. Kikyo took out the little black dress. It was a tube top dress that had a corset waist and stopped mid thigh. She had on black peep toes. Her hair was straightened and it reached just past her shoulder blades. We actually looked a lot alike. When she reached fame, many thought she was my twin.

"Kagome, you look beautiful! I hear from Shay you have my head shots and my money?"

"Yeah, they turned out really good. And your lucky, cause you weren't suppose to get your check till Thursday. You're lucky you're my little moneymaker." she laughs at this. A figure came behind her and it was none other than that sexy inu from earlier.

"Oh Kagome! Let me introduce you to my escort. This is Sesshomaru Takahashi, my brother-in-law."

_Killing Perfection? Sounds kinky. I like it._

"Sesshomaru, this is Kagome Higurashi, She owns the modeling and photography agency I'm signed to. And this is Shay Phillips, she owns the advertising company that works with Kagome. Because of these two ladies I'm rich, and I am eternally grateful to them."

"No problem Kikyo, it's my job to make stars. It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Takahashi." I said smoothly. Lord, I love looking at him.

"The pleasure is mine." he rumbled. There goes my libido into overdrive.

"Hey Kags, I want to do lunch before I go home to my husband. Let's hook up in Georgia. Give me your address?"

"Of course" I quickly jotted down my address and number.

"Wonderful. Sometime next week?"

"Yeah. Not on Tuesday though. I have to go to Lily's show." I wasn't paying any attention to her. I was looking at Sesshomaru like he was a piece of meat. I don't know what's come over me but I don't care.

I wanted Sesshomaru Takahashi, and I wanted him bad.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Don't own anything except the plot. Chapter title by Bright Eyes

Lover I Don't Have to Love

Me and Sesshomaru had kept contact after New York. I had come to learn a few things about him during our short encounters. He was from Kyoto, Japan, he was in line to inherit his fathers multi-million tech company, he was a full blooded Inu-Youkai, he had a younger Hanyou brother who was Kikyo's husband, and best of all he wasn't in a relationship so I didn't have to worry about a dumb broad calling me.

He asked some questions about me and I gave him limited information, if I even answered at all. He didn't push me to responed and I thanked him for that. I was currrently laying in a hotel bed next to him, with my head on his chest, our limbs a tangled mass. We'd gone three rounds and I was exhaused. I was lazily drawing circles on his chest and slightly humming to myself.

"How did you get away? I thought you had to tkae care of your daughter." he said in his soft baritone voice. It still had shivers running down my spine.

"I was, but she wanted to go on a trip with her friends family for the weekend and who was I to say no? Besides, it meant mommy could have fun, which is a rare comodity I'll have you know. Its not as easy to sneak away as it was when she was a kid. She's a teenager now, she knows things."

That was one of the things I let him know right off the back. Even though I wasn't planning on getting into relationships, for some reason they wanted to come to my house and that was out of the question for me. Lily wasn't to know what I did unless it was serious and it wasn't.

Fortunately, Sesshomaru could care less that I had a child. We had a good arrangement he and I. We were both mutually fufilled whenever we wanted, and we didn't have to worry about emotions getting in the way. He sometimes even helped me with some of the problems I had going on in my life. Although we only saw each other when he came to the States we made the most of it and I always couln't wait until he came back.

"You know she can tell when you lie? So I suggest you start using half truths in the future."

"What do you mean she can tell when I lie" I said sitting up suddenly.

"Demon senses miko"

I laughed humourously at that. I hadn't heard that term in such a long time. "How long have you known?" I said, bitterness finding its way into my voice.

"Since I first met you. Your aura is that of a miko."

"I'm not a miko. I nave miko blood, but I'm not one, I kinda screwed out my chances to do that. Besides, I'm your natural enemy. Why are you even having sex with me? Why are you showing an interest in me? Most demons would kill me on the spot."

"My beast calls to you, so I come."

"You're what?" I said, confusion lacing my voice.

"Forgive me, I forgot you have no knowledge of demonic ways. I'm not human, though I think you are intelligent enough to know this. There is a reason why I am called and Inu, miko. I am a beast, this is just my humanoid form. In actuality I am a giant dog. I have three forms. The one you see now, my half transformed form, and my true form. My true form, and and my human form are two different intities. My true form is my instinct, it calls to you and I listen."

"Oh my god. You just said more then one sentence. I'm so proud of you!" I said, punctuating it with a kiss. He looked a bit annoyed. "I'm going to assume you heard and retained the information I just gave you."

"I did. I don't understand it though, care to explain?" I said, as I snuggled deeper into his chest.

"I'll put it in terms your human mind can comprehend. My kind mate for life. We wait to comit to to another until our beasts recognize our soulmate. Once we find them we are bound to them for eterntity and will comit to that person fully. You are the one my beast recognizes as its soulmate."

"Hmmm. The said person doesn't have a say in the matter?" I said, resuming drawing circles on his chest.

"Usually the feelings are reciprocated."

"But what happens if that person doesn't feel the same way towards that person?"

"In theory it's possible, but it has never been heard of."

"So what makes you think I feel the same for you? Besides, if I was to have a soulmate it would have been Lily's father."

He snorted at this. "No, it would not have been him. If it would have, he would have marked you. There is no such mark on you, nor do you have any trace aura of an youkai. You were just a fuck partner and got pregnant on accident."

"Oh yea, that's a good way to make me see your little theory as correct yoiu stupid asshole. "I knew it was the truth but it didn't mean I had to like it. And hearing him say it in such a calm manner made it sound even worse. "And besides, I don't want ot be in any more relationships. The only constant in my life is Lily and its staying that way." I said with resoluteness in my voice. My words didn't seem to affect him though. He merely went into a sitting position, taking me with him and languidly licked the side of my neck.

"Your will is futile. Cease your protests you will be my mate. The sooner you accept your fate the better your life will become."

I wanted to responed to his brazen statement, but my open mouth was covered with his mouth and round for began.

"Mommy?" came the voice of the devil in disguise. I knew that voice. She wanted something she knew I'd say no to.

"If your asking about that tattoo or that belly button piercing then the answer is still no so don't even bother asking." She hopped into my lap her eyes full of hope. "Nope. that's not what I want."

"What is it" I said wearily. This didn't bode well. She drew in a long breath. Oh lord.

"Ok so Mama called while you were in Chicago and she was like its been so long since she's seen me and she was all she hasn't seen me since I was a baby and that you should be ashamed of yourself for keeping a grandmother from her grandchildren and that Ji-ji is getting up there and is going to die soon and that I haven't seen since I was four and-"

"What do you want" I said in frustration. Lord this girl had a pair of lungs on her.

"Can I go to Japan?" she blurted out suddenly.

"No." I said fairly calmly. And here I thought she was going to ask for something difficult.

"What? Why? Momma this is so unfair. Mama is so right I haven't seen her in such a long time and-"

"It's the middle of the school year for you. Why would I send you to Japan?"

"But-"

"No buts. You not going. If a break was coming up I would consider it. For now, its a definite no." I pushed her off my lap and involuntarily started to rub my neck. Mr. Stick-up-the-ass decided he was not going to take heed of my opinions and marked me as his intended. When I started complaining he smacked me on the ass and told me to deal with it. Stupid asshole.

"What's that?" she said suddenly, her gray eyes zoning in on the mark on my neck.

"Nothing" I said quickly zipping up my jacket to hide the offensive mark. Apparently she wasn't taking my no as an answer and in the flash of an eye had me pinned to the sofa and inspecting my neck closely, occationally giving it a sniff.

"Hey! You lilltle bitch you can't do this! I'm your mother you little cow, you can't use your demonic strength against me! I'll never forgive you!" I yelled thrashing frantically to no avail.

"You'll get over it." was her far away response. She was to busy looking at my neck to care. She was so on punishment until she was thirty. Her brow was furrowed in concentration, trying to decipher the information her nose was giving her.

"Smells like... dog. Powerful one at that." she sniffed some more "he's old too. Who is he? Where did you meet him?" She sat up with her legs still pinning me down and looked at me with a frown on her face. I looked at her stubbornly. Damn her heightened senses. "It does not concern you" I said defiantly. She looked at me with an eyebrow raised. "Oh yes it does mother dear. You see I unlike you understand demonic customs. And according to this mark, he's my new father, so yes it does concern me. Now who is he? I don't want my alpha to be a weakling."

"Tsk. He's not your new father, in fact, you wont even meet him. I'm of a mind to stop seeing the arrogant prick anyway. Way too over-confident." I said, crossing my arms. She smiled a small smile. "I doubt it. Demons don't just mark someone and have let them just walk away. He's going to come for you. Does he know about me?"

"Yes," I answerewd sullenly. "he smelled you on me one time."

"What did he say?" She had a gleam of hope in her eye. I realized how much she wanted the acceptance of this person who she didn't know. I hadn't knonw her desire for a father was that great. I thought I had shown her enough love that she wouldn't having one less parent. I decided to induldge her this once. With a sigh I answered all the questions I knew she was going to ask.

"His name is Sesshomaru. He's 700 and something. Silver hair golden eyes. I met him in New York a few months back and we kept in contact. He's a bussinessman in Japan and we meet up when he comes to the states."

"Can I meet him?" she said shyly. She looked like the cute four year old that I couldn't say no to. I sighed.

"Yes dear. Next time he comes I'll get him to come to our house." I said gently. She smiled excitedly and hugged me to her. "Thank's mom" she said excitedly as she ran up the stairs with an air of happiness surrounding her. As I watched her leave I took out my cellphone and dialed his number. He picked up after a few rings.

"Yes" came his ususal soft baritone.

"How fast can you get here?" I said, picking at my nails.

"It depends on what my motivation is."

"My daughter wants to meet you."

"So I see you have come to accept your place as my intended." he said amusement lacing his voice.

"Whatever. Can you get here or not?" annoyance in my voice.

"Next month I'm avalible on the 4th. I can stay for four days. Is that acceptable?"

"Fine" I said with a sigh "she's looking forward to it. She's never had a father."

"I will fill the place adequetly. She will want for nothing. Nor will you for that matter."

"Hey! I still don't accept it, but my babygirl wants a father figure and your the closest thing to it." I said still defiant at the notion that this was my future.

"Say what you will. You will be mine."

"Fuck you."


	4. Chapter 4

"Ms. Higurashi?"

"Yeah Mia?"

"You have a visitor." for some odd reason she sounded a little frightened. I dismissed the thought quickly.

I was currently in my office working on the plans for my show in the summer. I was tired, hungry, and horny, not the best of combinations. I was also highly irritated and didn't want to deal with anyone. The plan was to get in and outso I could get to my cookie dough ice cream at home.

"Oh? And does this visitor have an appointment?" I said while doing the tideous paperwork. This was the only thing I hated about having my own business.

"No"

"Well then I guess I wont be seeing them now will I?" I hung up the phone and began to work on the rough draft for the event. I just got my concetration and was thinking of the most brilliant plan when the shrill ringing of the phonew startled me growling in frustration I answered it.

"What is it this time?" I said with a bit more ire in my voice then was nessecary.

"I was told to tell you that you had not the autority to decide that you could not see him." I automatically knew who my unannounced visitor was. Only he had the arrogance to say such a thing and actually believe it. I sighed silently and shook my head. Pinching the bridge of my nose I said in a very clipped voice "You can tell Sesshoumaru that he can kiss my ass."

Apparently he heard my as in the next instant I heard he deep baritone voice. "I have already done that multiple times and intend to do so often in the future. You will not dismiss me in such a manner again miko." I winced at his statement. My staff was going to have a field day with this one. I could already hear them talking.

"You do not have an appointment." I said, deciding to ignore his first sentence. I'd deal with that later.

"I do not need an appointment to see my mate nor will I ever." I cringed again. He just had to make the gossip worse didn't he? Laying my head on my desk I mentally screamed. This was going straight to the papers, I just knew it. I started to bang my head against the hard surface. So much for my secret relationship. I heard my door open but didn't bother to look up.

"Cease your banging immediately, I find it offense to my person. And you will not hang up on me either."

"Do you know the meaning of a secrect relationship?" I said in a muffled voice.

"I'm aware if what it is."

"Guess what? Our relationship is a secret one. Meaning that no one was suppose to that revealing our status to my staff doesn't make it a secret anymore" I sai, finally looking up at him. He didn't seem bothered in the least. He was picking invisible lent of his shirt and checking his claws. The bastard didn't even have the decency to care!

"You are my mate miko. Every being that has heightened senses know you are claimed. And I would not genearlly keep my mate hidden as that would be an insult to her. Our relationship ceased being secret when I marked you." It amazed my that he sounded bored with everything he said. And that it was incredibly sexy. I didn't even catch what he said, I was to busy listening to the sound of his voice. He seemed to notice.

"Stop gawking miko, it is unbecoming. I am aware that my person is highly attractive, I do not need you to reestablish that." I glared at him. Just because he was prettier then me doesn;t mean he has to flaunt it.

"Why are you here?" I said in a hateful voice. He raised a brow at me. "It was to my knowledge that I was to come here to meet my pup at your request, or have you forgotten? I know human memory is dismal but you fall horribly below the standards."

"Leave." I said with as much venom as I could muster. Sometimes I just wanted to strangle him. He smirked and walked up to the desk He kissed me soundly on the mouth and looked me directly in the eyes. "Remember, you belong to me and no one else Kagome." he said in that sultry voice that sent chills down my spine. With one final heated look he walked out.

Life went on after my sudden mate status. As it turned out, Sesshoumaru' s family was very important in Japan, their names being in the paper every other day. Not only that but he was the heir to the West and all other Inu bowed down before him. That had been the shock of my day. I was slowly getting used to being back in a relationship and Lily loved having a father. She was already calling him daddy and he spoiled her rotten.

Only the family knew about us and it wouldn't go public until we moved to Japan. I took a few trips there and my unease about the country slowly disapated. My mom was more than overjoyed to have me back and looked forward to spending time with her granddaughter. Souta and I started to reconnect with one another. I hadn't even attempted to talk to my grandfather. He was stuck on his mindset that I had done the greatest sin and had dishonored the family name. It hurt me but I wasn't going to let it effect me too much.

Sesshomaru came by everyday and when he didn't he called me every five minutes. It annoyed me greatly but I knew he only did it because he cared. I had been talking to some of my demonic friends and they told me that it was natural and that he was going ot be overly possesive of me and Lily and that it would only get worse when we mated completely. Oh great, just what I needed.

I was currently in Japan laying in Sesshoumaru's bed after spending a long day rememorizing the streets. I was only going to be here for two days and then we would head back for Lily's recital. I really didn't see a point in coming but his company was hosting a ball so I had to go. But I really wasn't complaining. Whenever he did come home from the office he took me out on shopping sprees. He really knew the way to a girls heart. I sighed as I flipped though the t.v and and stopped to watch MTV and eating Lays chips. Sesshoumaru decided to come in at that moment and observed me briefly and made his way to his desk.

"Should you not be dressed for the day?" he said with his back to me. I looked down at myself. I was wearing some pajama shorts and a snug tank top. I really didn't see anything wrong. "I was dressed then I changed. What's it to you?" I said, a slight edge in my voice. "I will not have my mate attired in improper clothing." he said without missing a beat. I frowned. "Unproper clothing? How is this improper? I'm in the comfort of my room." He turned to me as if I was a simpleton. "Your wearing cotton." he stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. My mouth gaped as I stared at him. Ther really were no words. "Your worse then a chick!" I exclaimed in disbelief as I got up and made my way to the kitchen. "And I would think I would know that it's okay to where cotton seeing as I _am_ the fashion guru of the U.S!" I shouted.

I was putting the finishing touches on my make-up. I was wearing a cream off the shoulder dress that reached the floor. The neckline plunged and stopped just before my clevage. The waist was sinched and clung all the way down to my hips and fanned out. I donned a pair of Jimmy Choo's and grabbed my silver clutch and made my way to the main room of the house where Sesshoumaru was adjusting his black tie. He looked mouthwatering in a dark charcol grey suit with a black undershirt. I was having fantasies of taking it all off with my mouth. He looked out of the coner of his eye.

"Again with the gawking. You really need to correct that problem." he murmered as he turned on his heel. It was tailored to fit hie body perfectly. I could almost see the muscles bulging underneath. I let out a barely audible moan but of course he head it. His eyes honed in on my mouth and his head cocked to the side analyzing me. Je walked towards me in an agonizingly slow pace and by the time he reached me I was panting. He placed his fingertips on either side if my waist and brought his nose to her neck breathing in deeply. My eyes closed as I exhaled loudly. He brought his face back up and stared into my eyes. He let go of me and walked towards the door.

"Come, we shall be late if we continue to tarry." he said over his shoulder. He walked out the door and I had to mentally collect myself before I walked after him. It was shameful that he barely touched me and already I was heated. Sighing, I walked down the stairs and was helped into the limo by the driver. I kept my eyes averted from my mate and stared as Tokyo Downtown rushed by me. We arrived shortly after and I waited as Sesshoumaru got out and opened the door. As soon as I stepped out the bright flashes of cameras surrounded me. I could hear the shouts of reporters wondering who Mr. Taisho's date was. I already knew I would be on the front cover of every newspaper and magazine by midnight tonight. Deciding that I didn't want one of those horrid candid pictures I smiled gently as we passed. Making out way into the entrance hall classical music wafted softly around and you cold hear the slight buzz of conversation. I walked on his arm and as we made our way to the the main table where Inuyasha, his vice president, and Miroku, his lawyer sat. I turned to talk to Kikyou who was sitting next to Inuyasha and the night went smoothly.

After the meal was served the floor was cleared to begin dancing. Sesshoumaru stood and turned to me "Miko" he said simply as he extended his arm. We made our way to the center of the floor and he began twirling me. As we danced I could literally feel the heated glares that the envious women were giving me. I rolled my eyes. "Your groupies are annoying me. How many have you slept with?" I growled lightly so that only he heard me. He looked down at me blankly. "The majority of them excluding five." he said nonchalantly. I glared up at him. Kami, he was such a whore. "Demons don't get STD's do they?" I said, anger creeping into my voice. He looked down at me, amusment evident in his eyes. "Demons are not suseptable to human diseases. And as you aren't human I doubt you would be able to contract anything either Kagome."

"I frowned up at him. "It the principle of the matter. Honestly, you slept with disease ridden women? Where are your standards?" I said disgustedly.

"Only five had anything"

"Oh wow, that makes everything better." I said sarcastically.


End file.
